For some crazy reason we all have a tendency to compare ourselves to others, and recently I find that I'm comparing myself to others quite a bit. I’m currently participating in two really intensive courses of study, Soul Teacher and Soul Expansion. The first has a weekly live class and three opportunities for live practice circles, there’s homework, exams, and a very active community on WhatsApp. The second also has a weekly live class and practice circles, plus a very active community on WhatsApp. What all this equals for me is; a massive personal expansion in my own growth, learning new and powerful energy healing tools, that I’m excited to share with you, being super scheduled, always really challenging for me, having literally hundreds of WhatsApp texts a day, I’m not kidding about that, and this is where comparison shows up. I find myself wondering how my fellow students find the time and energy to attend every practice circle and have so much extensive communication/connection on WhatsApp? I just cannot seem to keep up!
I’m not really a texter in regular life so turning on the WhatsApp notifications was a big deal for me. I usually leave my phone on silent because I find the constant interruptions… well interrupting. But because I’m really invested in these courses, emotionally, time wise, not to mention financially, I want to get the most out of them, however, I find impossible to keep up with the engagement, and I find myself comparing myself to all the progress/connections everyone else seems to be making.
Luckily I’ve done a lot of work on myself over the years and continue with daily practices so that I recognize the patterns of comparisons as they arrive. What I notice is that when comparison does arise, so do feelings of self-judgment. These can include, but are not limited to, not as good as, not organized enough, not committed enough, not smart enough, not good enough, and so on. When this happens I’m trying to be gentle with myself ,thanking that part of me that wants to do better, be the best, letting her know that I’ve got this, that I prefer to move at my own pace, and that I’m confident I will learn/receive all I’m meant to and in its own perfect time.
The main take away here is that comparison is the thief of joy. Period. And there are tools that I find helpful to move from comparing to self-acceptance.
The first is recognizing that comparing is what I'm doing. Awareness is key.
Then understanding that everybody at some point, will find themself comparing themself to someone else and not feeling awesome about it. It's human nature.
Next taking a good look at where I'm at and what I'm doing. Am I feeling self-judgement because I'm not putting in my best effort, or am I should'ing on myself. If it's the former, committing to do the work required and taking action is important. If it's the later then I find affirming, i.e. repeating a positive statement to myself. In the case mentioned above I'm affirming that I am good enough, I do enough, I have enough.
And then I remind myself that the way I like to move through life is:
In an easy and relaxed manner, in a healthy and positive way,
in its own perfect time, for the highest good of all.
Sending you, and that part of me that is still working to heal the wounds, many blessings on this path called life.
May you be happy. May you be at peace. May you feel loved.
Namaste